Are you secretly not happy with the success of friends?
13 Apr 2021Updated: 4 hours ago | people are reading
© Shutterstock It can feel like you are a bad person
Have you ever experienced a friend sharing great news with you, but you are actually not happy with them? Consider for example a good friend who has found a great job abroad, has a child or is getting married. You congratulate them, but inside you feel no joy. What is the matter and are you a bad person to feel that way?
Fear of abandonment
Friendship can enrich your life, but close friendships also include vulnerability. Of course you don't want to lose your friends and that is why you can get nervous if your friends get married, have children or leave. You are afraid that your friendship will fade and that is not even an unrealistic fear, because it is possible that your friends will have less time for you when they make big steps in life.
It makes sense to congratulate your friends if they succeed. However, you do not have to hide your negative feelings. If you are afraid of losing them, you can talk about it. Above all, make it clear that you care about them and that your friendship is very important to you.
You should feel guilty because it seems like you care more about yourself than success from your friend? It says more about how valuable your friendship is than about how selfish you are. What is especially important is that you support your friends and do not try to sabotage. Because although it is scary that a friend will be less present in your life, you still grant them happiness, don't you? In the end you will often find that the change is not too bad, because your best friends will not just forget you.