"How do I keep all those signs high?"

15 May 2021Updated: 4 hours ago | 52 people are reading

Working from home, teaching children, soothing arguments between brother and sister, while keeping the relationship with your partner harmonious in the meantime ... The corona crisis is really testing us all. WOMAN reader Ita has trouble keeping her head above water. She wonders: 'How do I make sure I don't go under?'

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Orthopedagogue and therapist Nelly ter Enter immediately recognizes Ita's concerns, and warns: "Now that we are constantly on each other's lips, it is more important than ever as a mother to keep an eye on your own interest (s). Otherwise I foresee a huge wave of burnouts in a few months. ”

Risky

“ Because mothers tend to put the interests of their child (ren) first and themselves they want to take on all the lost roles during this crisis. They are mother, but also teacher, football coach and dance teacher, but in the meantime their work continues and they also have time for quality time with their partner. Because you cannot function 100% in any of those roles, it is very hard work for a continuously persistent feeling of dissatisfaction. That is very risky. ”

“ Mothers are getting more and more tired and they feel they are falling short. "Am I not doing it right?" "Is it me?". These questions will be haunted more and more often. An additional effect is that there is almost no time left for contact with friends. You end up in a vicious circle. "

Routine

" That's why I say, "Realize that those responsibilities aren't just yours. You run a family together, so everyone contributes. And why would you want to keep all those existing routines? We are in an exceptional situation that is radically different, so it is not at all bad that everyday life looks different. You don't have to be in the books with your child all school days. And that your child now moves less, that is only the case. Let it go. Depending on their age, they can do many things themselves. "

" Make sure you really install time for yourself. That care instinct makes sense, but if you don't give yourself time to recharge, it will end up at the expense of your entire family. If your kids are in bed, don't leave that laptop aside. Take a bath, read a book. Even if it is only half an hour. Take care of yourself. ”