Regret: "I put my wife and her best friend together"

12 May 2021Updated: 4 hours ago | 52 people are reading


© Offered by De Telegraaf

COLUMN - I saw two friends standing in a bar. The one beautiful but with a slightly sour expression on her face. My gaze stuck to the other woman. More the neighbor girl type, but sunny, smiling broadly. She made me happy.

I walked over to them and had a chat. The sour beauty was called Marina, the girl next door Astrid. My first impression turned out to be correct. Marina said no boo or yuck, turned her nose at me. Astrid chatted, talked about herself with humor, and was also interested in me.

I saw a date and gave Astrid my phone number. For weeks I heard nothing from her and I was afraid it would stay that way. Finally she called and we went on a date.

When we were in a restaurant, I asked carefully why it had taken her so long to call me. Astrid said, "Marina was not feeling well."

I had to bite my tongue so as not to say anything nasty about her friend. Not a good move on a first date. Instead, I laughed loudly and said something like, "Luckily you can still decide for yourself!"

Astrid also laughed and started a long story about how much she trusted Marina. They had known each other since childcare when they were about five years old. They had been through it all and supported each other wherever they could. I quickly understood that separating the two was impossible.

Although I thought that Marina might become a problem, our date was a success and many more followed. We got into a relationship.

I saw Marina every now and then and she always had the same attitude: that I was not good enough for Astrid. But I was here to stay. I love that woman.

Over the years I started to understand why Marina is the way she is. Child of divorced parents, an inferiority complex, sulky, good-looking but unhappy in love.

And selfish. When Astrid and I got married, Marina was missing from the wedding. It seemed like the perfect time to be ready for your girlfriend, but Marina went on vacation. Supposedly planned months in advance, but I wouldn't have been surprised if she booked a last minute. Not to have to see that I ran off with Astrid. Because I knew she was still whispering in Astrid's ear that I was no good, even though I had long proven that I would do everything for my future.

I figured out how to discharge Marina and eventually it turned out that easy to be. I booked a long weekend for four in a hotel on the coast and invited Marina and her new friend. Very generous of me ... Marina said yes, but I knew she would drop out.

And indeed: suddenly Marina was ill. Astrid went there with a pan of chicken soup and found her friend in excellent health. Astrid called her ungrateful, they got into an argument and that was that. I breathed a sigh of relief, was secretly a bit triumphant.

Astrid has been uncomfortable lately. Family circumstances make her sad, and I can't comfort her enough. She could use a good friend. But she no longer has that. And now I'm sorry.